How I learned to accept and embrace the help of support workers

In December 2017, while on holidays with some friends, I sustained a spinal-cord injury. At the time, I didn’t realise the implications of this injury and what it would mean for my family and myself. My whole world had been turned upside-down in an instant. Being unable to feel and move the majority of my body, and coming to terms with changes to every part of my life, was extremely difficult.

For the first few months in hospital I didn’t deal well with the thought of living with a disability. The thought of moving on with my life and reasserting myself in the community, my work and my friendship circle was difficult to imagine. I had no idea what support I would need for all of this to happen.

My pride stopped me admitting it, but deep down, given my level of injury, I knew that I would never be able to support myself physically. No matter how much physiotherapy and rehabilitation I put myself through. Slowly, I had to come to terms with accepting support work as part of my life. This started with mentally supporting myself, by coordinating the supports to help me to achieve goals in my life.

It took a while to shift my thinking and realise there’s no shame in needing help. There’s nothing weak about needing support for certain parts of your life, and I’ve made great friends and connections through the network of support I’ve received because of my injury.

However, it’s important to get these supports right. I remember the first night at home after leaving the hospital, a support worker I’d never met arrived to help me get into bed and get set up for the night. They didn’t speak to me, and I felt so uncomfortable about this whole concept of support work at this point.

Another difficult early experience of support work was in the first few weeks after leaving hospital. I was waiting for a morning support work shift to start so I could get up out of bed and start my day. The staff member never turned up, and I was left stranded in bed. I had to call one of my mates and ask them if they could help me out. This was something that was very difficult to do.

I didn’t want to put my mate in a position where my injury would impact the dynamic of our friendship, and it was also difficult to accept that help from him. Of course, I’m extremely grateful for my friends and that they can help me in this way if I ever need, but I am adamant to make this the exception, not the rule.

Experiences like these taught me that it’s so important to establish a good network of support workers. Making sure that you are comfortable with a reasonable number of support workers means that you’ll never get stuck without support and makes for a good balance. Building a strong team and good rapport with multiple support workers not only makes things easier on you, but also makes things more sustainable for your support team.

Another tip would be to use a platform like Hireup to connect with support workers and get to know them so that you are both comfortable with the requirements of the support prior to booking a shift. It’s often useful to ‘meet and greet’ potential support workers, so you can get to know each other a little bit in a social setting before working together. This can often build a great foundation and set the expectations for the working relationship into the future.

Coming to terms with and accepting the need for ongoing physical support is difficult. Letting a support worker assist you with things like personal tasks can definitely be challenging. Which is why finding the right people and the right support is so important. Connecting with enough support and with the right people is critical for you to be the best version of yourself every day.

Find out how you can connect with support workers that are right for you.

Get started today and connect with local Hireup support workers.

Steven Ralph is a tech entrepreneur and brand expert who is passionate about removing barriers for people with accessibility requirements. As an advocate and mentor for community groups and individuals living with spinal cord injury, his vision is to create a future that is inclusive and accessible for everyone.